Almost finished... again.

I can't believe you went to the trouble of trying to read this.  Loser!

Columns

  A Critical Look
by Steven Kilpatrick
  Bagged and Bored
by Christopher Roy
  Blood Sugar Sex Magik
by Linnit duFlon
  The Box
by sAm Larson
  ...but the Tips are Great
by Angela Powell
  The Colour of Morale
by Tom Blackett
  Confessions of the Lurker Girl
by girlwholurks
  Escaping Individuality
by Jennifer Miller
  The Mad Spin
by Steven Kilpatrick
  I Might Be Wrong
by Rob Lumley
  Kilpatrick's HSO's
by Steven Kilpatrick
  Shooting Ducks
by Daniel Lutz
  StripTease
by J. Balfe & D. Kenny
  Unfettered Access
by David Mitchell
  Urban Adventure
by Jane C. Nolan
  Wasteland
by Noga Westerlund
  Will Sell Out for Food
by Adam Appel
 

Guest Column

Retired Columns

  Cultural Bondage
by Rob McDole
  The Dark Mirror
by Steven Kilpatrick

Other

 

Submissions

Divine Dining

with Diana(chef_chick)


Cooking for the Pretentious Dark Father: Part I

This week column is dedicated to the Crapper's one and only: Dark Father. He has suggested some recipes for healthy vegetables and duck.

The best duck ever has to be duck confit. For those of you who aren't familiar with it, duck confit is a wonderful dish that is tender and delicious not to mention extremely fattening. The duck is salted and allowed to sit in a refrigerator overnight and sometimes days, then essentially cooked in a large amount of duck fat for hours until tender and practically falling off the bone. You find a lot of recipes pairing duck with some sort of fruit sauce. There's the classic duck a l'orange, but then other sauces made with cherries, plums, apricots, and raspberries. And a lot of times duck is accompanied with apples or pears. Aside from the duck confit, the way I love to prepare duck is the simple and basic way, pan fried. The good thing about duck is that you do not have to add any extra oil to the pan. Start the well-seasoned duck skin side down in the sauté pan and let it go. Since duck alone is loaded with calories, I like to use it in a salad or on a sandwich like a wrap or a pita. But generally the uses are endless.


Duck Breast Salad with Orange Vinaigrette
This recipe is also delicious when placed in a wrap. Try this if using a wrap-- ½ cup hoisin sauce and ¼ cup of plum sauce as a dip. Both can be found in the Asian section of the supermarket.

2 boneless duck breasts with skin
Salt and pepper to taste
½ cup orange juice; from 1-2 fresh oranges
1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
2 teaspoons honey
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
¼ cup olive oil, canola oil, or vegetable oil
2 cups favorite lettuce, chopped
¼ cup scallions, sliced thinly
¼ cup diced or sliced pears
1 ounce feta cheese, crumpled (optional)

1. Season the duck breasts well with salt and pepper.
2. Heat a large skillet over a medium high heat and place duck breasts skin side down and lower heat to medium and adjusting heat accordingly so that the skin doesn't burn.
3. Allow to cook skin side down until skin is thin and browned. Approximately 15-20 minutes. (You may have to drain any large amounts of fat that collect in the pan.)
4. Once the skin is brown, turn the duck over and allow the other side to cook until desired doneness. (5-8 minutes)
5. Remove from pan and allow to sit for 5 to 10 minutes before slicing into strips on an angle across the grain.
6. While the duck breasts are cooking, prepare the vinaigrette by pouring the orange juice, balsamic vinegar, honey, the cayenne pepper in a medium bowl. Whisk and season to taste with salt and pepper.
7. Whisk in the oil of your choice.
8. Pour half of the vinaigrette in a large bowl and add the lettuce, onion, and pears.
9. Then toss to coat all the ingredients with the vinaigrette.
10. Arrange the salad on plates and top with sliced duck and feta cheese.
11. Drizzle the remaining vinaigrette over the duck.


I believe most people do not eat enough vegetables. Or if they do eat them, they are saturated with butter and cheese or just plain overcooked and mushy. I like vegetables that taste like vegetables and are still crisp and firm. Vegetables are an important source of vitamins, minerals, and nutrients. In order to retain those important building blocks of nutrition, vegetables need to be cooked properly or else all that is good for you is destroyed. In that case, bring on the butter and cheese.

There are several different methods of preparing vegetables. Commonly vegetables are boiled or steamed. You can sauté, bake, grill, or batter vegetables as well. Before grilling vegetables it is a good idea to blanch them in boiling salted water for around 1-3 minutes depending on the vegetable. When the vegetables are removed from the pot, shock them in ice cold water to cool down and stop the cooking. Remove from cold water and pat dry with paper towels. This ensures that your vegetables do not burn and cook evenly. You can also marinate them after the blanching and shocking for a tasty treat. My favorite way to prepare many vegetables is in the microwave. I know, it sounds horrible, but it is not. It is a quick and nutrient conserving way to cook vegetables.


Microwaved Broccoli
When I use broccoli, I cross-hatch the stems so that they cook uniformly. To cross-hatch the broccoli, cut the stems in half vertically (and sometimes quarters depending on the thickness) stopping before you get to the florets. You wind up with perfectly cooked broccoli.

1 bunch broccoli, trimmed and cut into florets with stems
1 teaspoon canola oil (or preferred oil)
¼ teaspoon salt
¼ teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
1 tablespoon water
¼ cup onion, julienne (optional)

1. Place the broccoli in a large microwave safe bowl.
2. Drizzle the oil over the broccoli being sure to lightly coat all of the broccoli.
3. Toss to coat with the salt, pepper flakes, and onion.
4. Pour in the water.
5. Cover tightly with plastic wrap and microwave on high for 2-3 minutes until desired doneness is reached.

Pecan Pralines
This recipe is so easy and delicious. You will need a thermometer for it though. A candy one works well and is inexpensive. I have all different types, but have found that a digital one is best for all occasions and you can find them for around $11. This recipe works well with both evaporated milk and heavy cream. So, use whatever you have on hand.

1 ½ cups granulated sugar
1 ½ cups brown sugar; firmly packed
1 cup evaporated milk or heavy cream
3 tablespoons butter (not margarine)
3 ½ cups pecan halves

1. Line two baking sheets with parchment, waxed paper, or just grease them well.
2. Combine the sugar, brown sugar, and the evaporated milk (heavy cream if using) in a pan.
3. Stir over medium heat until mixture boils.
4. Continue stirring constantly until a thermometer reaches 228 to 230 F (109-110 C).
5. Quickly stir in butter and pecan halves.
6. Continue to cook until the thermometer reads 240 F (116 C).
7. Remove from heat and beat with wooden spoon for one minute or electric mixer. Be sure to work quickly because the praline will start to set as it cools.
8. Immediately drop by tablespoonfuls onto to prepared baking sheets and allow to cool for 1-2 hours. Store in an airtight container.


This Friday, the 16-my cousin's 3 month-old baby, Liberty Marie, has to undergo surgery to correct a congenital heart defect. I would appreciate if you all would send good thoughts and positive vibes toward Fort Worth, Texas for little Miss Libby Doo and her parents. Thanks! Until next time-best wishes to all and happy cooking.


Navigation

Home  
About  
Forum  
Archives  
Featured Script  
Monthly Contest  
Update Schedule  
Contact  

Links

View Askew  
News Askew  
Movie Poop Shoot  
View Askew WWWBoard  
Angry Naked Pat  
View Askew User Photos  
Jay & Silent Bobs Secret Stash  
UK Askew  
Jeff Weaver's Mom  

Flushes

 

Since 7-13-02

Disclaimer

This site was last updated 01/05/2004

© 2002 Copyright The Askew Crapper

Google
Search WWW Search theaskewcrapper.com