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Moving
Woes & Home Theater Hoes
Moving is always tough. You have to
pack, you have to tape, you have to organize... then comes the loading, the
tying down, the driving, the unloading... then comes the unpacking, the
reorganizing, the cleaning... it is a horrid process that ends in either
loosing or breaking something very dear to you (like my King Kong action
set).
I recently moved my fiancée into my
small 550 square foot apartment. It was wonderful (this would be sarcasm).
Consolidating her larger apartment into my smaller one left us with
wall-to-wall clutter, limited paths of access to the kitchen, bathroom, and
closet, and an overall sense of "what the hell was I thinking." Don't get me
wrong, there was no problem "between us", it was just the feeling that I was
living on the set of Joe's Apartment that made me queasy. So the day finally
comes to renew the moving ritual. After sacrificing her cat upon the altar
of a "no pets" policy, we were ready to begin (well, that was my idea to get
around the policy, her's was to lie to the management and sneak the cat in
under the veil of night) we began moving into the palatial estate (read:
house that has more than 1500 sq. ft.--which to me, if positively echoing),
but now comes the best part of any new move in--buying new stuff.
Now that I have a place that is
immense, I must fill it with expensive new things that fit my fancy (and are
not vetoed by the ol' ball and chain). So I suggested some cool new items to
make this pad (as the kids say) the most jammin' of them all:
Pool Table. I mean a place with a
pool table is like the Playboy Mansion minus all the scantily clad women,
celebrities, and grotto-type waterfalls. After hearing that explanation, she
promptly said no. Damn. Well, what about...
Foosball Table (do you see a pattern
here? I'm a kid, and I think as such). Think of the fun four people will
have developing carpal tunnel syndrome by making plastic figures do more
back flips than Mary Lou Retton on a speed binge. Again I was met with
denial, and worse than that, a counter offer of a bed-in-a-bag followed by a
rug for the dining room. I swiftly rebutted with…
A life-sized chessboard. Dorky? Yes.
But this is a dream I've had since I was 8 or so and it would be pretty
simple. Just buy 64 alternating colored sponge stone squares and arrange
them in the yard. Now, the chess pieces would be something of a difficulty.
You could carve them out of logs, Styrofoam, or Swedish fish, or you could
use your friends (given that you have 32 friend lying around on an idle
Sunday with nothing better to do). She didn't say anything to this request,
only began pulling at her ring finger trying to loosen something up. So very
carefully I suggested the next acquisition to our abode:
A large, flat screen TV with a home
theater system. There was this odd look that come from her when I said that.
I couldn't quite place it since I had never seen it before, but I soon found
out it was the look of acceptance. And not only that, but of mild
excitement. Really, I thought to myself, she went for that one? Really, she
did. And not only that, she improved upon it. We will soon be heading to
Best Buy to purchase a 36" flat screen Toshiba TV, a RCA 500 Watt Home
Theater System with Dolby 5.1 surround sound, and a large entertainment
center that will house this beautiful technology as well as our growing DVD
collection. All in total: around $1,800 (um, with 18 months, no interest
financing).
How do I love this woman? Let me
count the ways.
And what do I have to do in order to
realize my home theater dream? Let the cat live.
It's going to be a tough choice, but
I think I can compromise with her on this one. |
